Hard Knocks is just the best. The start of fuckin football, boys and girls. We won’t be able to see some of these dudes get cut unfortunately, but it’s still gonna be a great season of prime time HBO entertainment baby. Even though Jet fans are absolutely fuckin unbearable, they do have a likable team. Garrett Wilson and Sauce Gardener are dogs, and I kinda like how Rodgers is just a cocky piece of junk who doest care about anything. Except ayahuasca. Also, Salah seems pretty cool and he has a great head coach voice. Don’t be a crow.
Episode 1
Pretty much focused on Rodgers’ fans, teammates, and coaches absolutely sucking his ween. They’re not wrong, but it was funny seeing A Aron bask in the spotlight. He loves the attention which is why nobody is surprised he went to New York. I thought obsession with the voice of hard knocks is pretty weird but funny as hell. I mean he’s obsessed. Just begging everyone to say hi to the voice of God. Liev Shriver pretty much becomes the star of this episode because of their love affair as they spend more time with the narrator than any other player, pretty much. Anyway, It was pretty cool seeing Sauce Gardner graduate and get that degree for his mama. Seems like a cool dude. Him and Wilson going at it in practice will be fun to watch all hard knocks. Iron sharpens iron if you will.
I kinda feel bad for Zach Wilson but hes not in a bad spot right now. First of all, he was drafted at 2 so he made north of 30 million right there. Even though he struggled the last two years, he now has a prodigy in Rodgers to emulate (yeah you like that fuckin word). With Rodgers only having like 3 years left, he’s chillin.
The guy who came out looking the best after this epi was Nate Hackett. After a pretty horrendous year in Denver, its clear that everyone in the league still loves him (except Sean Payton) and especially Rodgers. They just shoot the breeze and talk shit to each other all day. Rodgers has his back which is cool so you gotta root for hackey. I also love how hes an Austin Powers guy. Great taste in movies and shoutout goldmember. Also shoutout the guy Vito Contento who’s some Italian dude who works for the Jets.
The highlights from their preseason game weren’t great other than Zachy had some nice throws. The Chazz Surratt story is pretty cool though. Former QB converted to a dog linebacker. He had a pick in that game so i’m hoping he gets a spot.
If you ain’t got no haters you ain’t poppin.
Episode 2
Starts with some mentalist named Oz Pearlman who did some magic tricks in front of the boys. I’ve always wondered if the players like that stuff or think its dumb when head coaches have these random people come speak to the team. I don’t know, it might be a nice little distraction from camp. Anyway, it’s clear that the jets are a very chippy team during practice. There were multiple bench clearing fights which shows me that the boys are buzzin. Even with the many punches being thrown, Salah lets the boys get physical which could be a good or bad thing. We shall see.
The star of this episode was Quinnen Williams who just got a BAG of around 96 mil and let me tell ya QBall is worth every penny. (Shoutout Hackey for flipping him off for sacking Rodgers so much and ruining the offensive practice) I mean Jesus besides our boy Jon Allen I haven’t seen anyone throw people around like that. He dominated the Panthers O line in practice and during the preseason game which makes me scared of this pretty stacked deference. They didn’t focus too much on Rodgers, but he did have some good one liners. For starters he told his center that gets in there deeper than the other guys. That’s what he or she said. Anyway he also was explaining how he plays the wind when he throws deep balls which is something I never even knew
Quarterbacks do. Maybe it’s just Rodgers, but hearing him tell us what certain types of wind will do the nose or flight of the ball was pretty nuts. Along with hazing new officials and calling a panthers coach fat, it was funny seeing the jokester Rodgers get a series and give Tim Boyle shit for trying to see a tendency in his game. I mean God forbid.
The episode also highlights Will McDonald. The former Cyclone is a pretty weird dude. He has an obsession with body piercings and he definitely has double digits just on his face and ears. Lord knows how many more he has. However, he’s a fuckin dog on the field. Big dude with a huge motor and natural instincts to get to the quarterback. (what they showed during the episode) This combined with his shiftiness shows me he’ll be a good player in this league. Says he has an “unpredictable style.”
The last thing they showed before the preseason game highlights was the rookie show. I would skip it if you haven’t seen it. I mean just absolutely so so terrible and not funny at all. They put no effort into it at all and it was just sad. The other Jets players started throwing trash at them and believe you me I would have if I were there. Just a poor showing from the rookies. Thank goodness for CJ Moseley standing up and telling them that they have to run it back next week. They deserve it. Where is Jenkins when you need ‘em. Not much else to report from the game other than Hackey told Zach Wilson that he turned him on. Will be interesting to see Cook involved next week for epi 3.
–Badger
Photo Credit: AP Photo/John Minchillo